Tuesday Thoughts.

It's a Tuesday afternoon. It's raining outside, but somehow it's still a bit hot inside my room. Just thought I'd rattle out some thoughts as I wait for dinnertime.

I don't know how I'll ever be able to work in the corporate world. From what I've seen and heard, it doesn't seem like I'm going to enjoy that kind of life. Slaving away day after day for a paycheck, doing things no one is really passionate about, having mindless conversations with co-workers I'd never see outside of work - I'm not about that. I'm not about any of that.

The thing about having studied Actuarial Finance is that the only thing I can do, based on my qualifications, that does not involve sitting in an office somewhere making decisions on money that doesn't belong to me is probably to go into teaching. Which doesn't really sound all that bad, to be honest, since I actually do enjoy teaching.

Working as an academic, you'd presume, means I'll be working with intelligent, like-minded people, which means there'll be plenty of intellectual talk and discussion and rational approaches to decision-making and problem-solving. That's what I'd like to think, but, of course, the reality is never really how you like to think it is.

Wherever you go, there will always be drama. There will always be office politics. There will always be factions, and a certain element of us-against-them. Universities are filled with more educationally-qualified people than any other institution you can think of, and yet there's still no escaping issues that you think wouldn't be present among people of such stature. Intelligent people are still human beings, after all, and there's no way to fully eliminate the flaws that come with being human.

So there's really only way to avoid the problems that come with working with other people: working on your own. But that doesn't really fit with me either; I'm a pretty lazy person, and I don't think I have it within me to do anything without needing any kind of help or consultation. And what kind of work, if you hope to bring in a significant amount of income with someday, can really be done completely on your own, without needing to enlist the services of other people?

I guess when the time comes, I'll just have to accept it. I'll still have to get some kind of job someday, ideally one which provides me with more than just enough to pay the bills, and that need for money will overcome my need for avoiding negative human interaction. That's just how things are, and that's why anyone even bothers with whatever job they have to do. In fact, I'm quite privileged to have been able to avoid getting a job for so long, and I should be thankful for that.